When My Life Seems LIke It's Going Awesome, I Just Get Worse

By this I mean that for 3 weeks now I have been on and off sick with different things. It makes no sense to me what so ever. This week has been the worse. By Friday last week I finally got to feeling better and the party turned out to go better than expected. Still not sure about how the guy I like feels about me, but at least we talk to each other and hang out. I know I want more, but I have no idea about him. Anyways, this week again Monday was good for only one reason, but mostly that day was horrible. I felt terrible and had to leave work early. I haven't even been back to work lately because of how horrible I feel. My mom thinks it's the flu. I have never had the flu, so I don't know what it's like. And if I do have it I really don't want to get others sick. I have also missed more classes than ever this week. I hate that part because I know I do not need to be missing classes. I have also barely eaten anything and no medicine seems to help me. I don't want to go back to Redfern(the student health center here on campus) because last time they didn't help me at all. All I really want is one week where I don't feel extremely crappy. Yesterday was pretty bad too. I had an exam that I couldn't miss because medical excuses for this class don't allow for a make up exam. I have no idea if I did as well as I could have on the exam. Right now all I want is to be my normal self again. Is that too much to ask? Tomorrow I plan on going to work, apologizing for missing so much. and going to all my classes because none of them can be missed. I will have to deal with the way I feel and get through the day no matter what. I hope I don't lose my job. It's not like I planned to be sick. I even went in Monday planning to stay my whole shift, when 45 minutes in I nearly threw up and had to leave. I think my boss understands. I also don't want to get anyone else sick if I am contagious. I don't know what to do right now, I just want to feel better! 

Can't This Just Go Away

So lately I have been feeling really crappy. There's absolutely no reason for it. Honestly I don't understand why I feel so low. Earlier this week, Monday, I had an awesome day that should have made my whole week awesome, but no by Tuesday I was feeling like I hit rock bottom. Then yesterday I just felt even worse. Not even seeing the guy I have a too huge of crush on made me feel any better. That's when I knew something was wrong. I'm not only feeling low, I feel nauseous, extremely tired, don't want to eat anything, and short of breath. I am at this moment blaming it on this new medicine that I started taking that is suppose to make me feel better but all it's done is make me feel worse. On Monday I was excitedly looking forward to Friday, now I don't know. There's this party going on Friday, that I was happily looking forward to but now it's making me upset. I want to stop taking this medicine, but I'm not sure if that will help or just make things worse. On top of that I need to go see the doctor but today happens to be my busiest day and absolutely have no real free time to stop by there and wait since I have no appointment. I could possibly go tomorrow, but at this point I honestly don't care. That's another thing, I've started thinking I don't care about a lot of things and last week that was not the case. I feel like I have become the most depressed person in the world, and I blame this medicine. I wasn't blaming the medicine, I was thinking it was just me, till I told my mom and she told me to check the side effects of what I'm taking online. Turns out everything I'm going through is a possible side effect of the medicine. Another problem with that is it's not like I got one or two side effects, it's like I've gotten almost all of them! That seems odd to me. So maybe I should see the doctor, but I have no time and can't really make time. So I really have no idea what to do right now. 

Something is Wrong, But I Don't Know What

So I haven't been feeling well lately. I have no idea why. It's basically been all summer that I've felt awful. I started being constantly thirsty, but I also have stopped eating very much. I don't know if that's a symptom or has to do with something else entirely. The other day I had the worse stomach ache, and couldn't really get out of bed. The clinic on campus is closed on weekends, and I really had no way to get to anywhere else, seeing as I don't have a car, and my roommate, who has a car, was gone to the football game. I was fine staying in my room. I took some medicine, watched some movies, and basically slept off whatever was wrong with me that day. I did call my mother, and she wants me to go to Redfern, our health center here at Clemson, whenever they are open again. I don't really have the time to be sick or to go get checked out. My schedule is fully packed each day. Maybe that's what's wrong with me, the stress of being in a new place and not doing the same thing everyday like I use to. Who knows? I just know that over my whole summer I didn't feel well, and now it just seems to be getting worse. I want to be my somewhat normal self again! I don't know what could be wrong with me. I have a lot of different things going on that don't really seem to add up. Maybe I should just stop complaining. I don't think complaining about this will help me at all. At least I felt a lot better today, but who's to say I won't feel just as crappy as I did Saturday. Argh!!!! This is just frustrating. Well hopefully I will start feeling better, or at least someone can tell me what's wrong when I go to Redfern when it's open again.

Adios,

Alisha