Finally Over!!!

I have officially finished summer classes! Hooray! Now I can go home and sleep! Finally! The torture that is Chemistry 102 is now over! I can now take a short break and not worry until August 24th, which is when I start back for fall semester. Hopefully I can get through it. I seriously don't think I'll be doing another summer course, especially not at my school. I'm still looking into transferring, but I have till April to send in my applications, that's enough time to decide. I'm hoping this week and a half is enough time for me to catch back up on sleep, who knows if I'll get any during the fall. This break also means that I probably won't be posting that much, not that I do that now. It mainly means I probably won't be posting that much on my other blog, the one I review books on. Well anyways this was just suppose to be a short rant about finally being done with summer classes. I am never going through that again!(Hopefully)

Oh and before I forget, I remember that last year I had posted about working at the post office. Well I thought I would still be working there, but they got bought out. I was going to reapply and work for the new company(they really seemed to want me), but I had applied for a couple of other jobs just in case I wasn't guaranteed a job at the post office, which I wasn't. So I had an interview with Special Collections, a branch of the library, and they were willing to hire me that day. So I went to talk to the new boss at the post office, and he told me he would love to have me but there was no guarantee and actually told me to take the job at the library. I wasn't going to argue. I kind of wanted a change. I loved working at the post office, but I have always loved the library and am hoping that this job goes ok. I also liked that they basically guaranteed me a job as long as I informed them of my plans by today. I had talked to the post office on Monday, and then called them that same day. It's the same hours, same pay. It's just a change of scenery. I won't see people as much, but I'm an introvert, I never really liked dealing with arrogant college students anyways. The only reason I say this is because a bunch of them thought they had a right to tell me how to do my job, when they had no idea what they were talking about. One girl even told me to tell whoever puts stuff in the mailboxes to make sure not to cause the boxes to open because hers was open. After talking to one of my supervisors, I was told there was no way we could of caused her box to come open from putting mail in there. She had left it open. I wasn't mad that she told me this, I was mad at the way she said, all high and mighty. No, I'm not going to miss it. I am going to miss being able to tell my friends when their package has gotten there, or being there when mine got there, and being able to get as soon as I processed it. I loved that part. I also really liked my co workers, but only a few of them are going to still be there. I'm really looking forward to my new job. I will most likely start as soon as fall semester starts, which is another plus since the post office couldn't tell me when I would be able to start back if I did get the job.

Now this is really the end of this post.

Alisha

Change...

I want a new look because I feel like I need a change. I need some clothes that tell people who I am. At the moment, I feel neither my clothes nor my hair tell people anything about me. I have always been someone who never wanted to copy what others wear. I wanted my own style, wanted to be as far from the norm that I could handle. Yet in college, I feel like I didn't do this. I feel like I didn't show people the true me when they first met me. It's hard for me to tell people anything, and I think I try to get some things out by wearing what I wear. Again, I think I toned it down when I got to college. I'm not saying I wore crazy clothes in high school. I did wear a mix between punk and skater and I don't know what. It was whatever I felt like wearing that day. I do know that nowadays I just wear jeans and a t-shirt, and I've come to hate this look. I use to wear skirts with colorful leggings and just as colorful Converse. I think I've dressed like this once, and the Converse weren't as colorful and I looked like I was dressing up and no one knew I would wear something like this on a normal day for me. I don't know what happened to me. I know I learned more about myself once I got to college, but yet I changed the one part of me I thought I knew. I changed how I dressed and I don't like it. I don't like it even more that stores I loved to shop at have started selling clothes I would never wear. I love my shoes, but the one time of the year that I am actually willing to wear sandals(I don't like flip flops, I'll only wear them sometimes) they start selling these ugly gladiator sandals. I loathe those shoes. I don't get why no sandal besides the ones for old ladies can be anything but gladiator sandals. If they aren't than they are also just as ugly or hurt my feet. I've had the hardest time finding a pair of sandals to wear that I've gone most of this summer wearing TOMS. I want to be able to find clothes or shoes that scream me! But so far no such luck. It's either make my clothes, which is not really an option since I know only how to use a sewing machine a little bit, or start dressing like everyone else, which I don't want to happen. Again I say, I want to find a look that screams me. I have no idea what type of look suits me, I thought I did, but I can't really say I classify myself as any sort of type of person anymore. I use to dress like a prep in middle school, that's who I thought I was, then in eighth grade I decided I wanted to go more punk but not that over the top. I kept that up till maybe senior year, which is when I just started wearing anything I felt like and if I liked it, it was what I wore that day. I didn't care what people thought, I only cared what I thought, still do. But now I don't like what I wear and think that I've settle for clothes that I probably never really liked. It's not like I hate everything I own. I actually love a lot of the clothes I own, but I feel that I may have this one shirt, but not say a cool cardigan or cool pants or jeans to go with it so the overall affect is gone. Sometimes I don't wear a certain shirt because I feel that if I wear with the jeans I own then they will tone it down, and I'll not be me anymore on the outside. Same thing goes with my hair. I want it long, but my hair doesn't grow that fast and also I feel my hair style isn't me. I feel I'm having an identity crisis but only with the outside. Like I know who I am on the inside but that doesn't come through on the outside. It is completely frustrating most days, and some days I wish I could go on a shopping spree just to find the me on the outside. Just to find those clothes that will finally show people who I am. Maybe it's just in my head that the person I am doesn't come through when I step outside or when I choose what shirt to wear, maybe others can tell what type of person I am, but I think they can't. It doesn't matter if they can, I want to be the one who notices. Because I haven't ever asked someone what they think when  I know I like what I have on, it's only when I'm not sure, and lately I feel like I need to ask people and I hate that. This is just too frustrating. I'm hoping I can find this new look that shows me.

Alisha

What is in a Name?

Alisha:

Meaning: 'Protected by God', 'Trustworthy', and 'Noble.'


Do I fit my name? Am I really "trustworthy" or "noble". Some days I despise that I was given a name that's common. I don't believe myself to be normal, and would like a name to reflect this.  Maybe the spelling isn't common and maybe some people pronounce my name wrong all the time( they don't say it like you would say Alicia). Maybe I wish I had a cool nickname I would allow everyone to call me instead of my name. I do get called different nicknames but by different people. My sister hardly ever calls me by my name anymore preferring to call me Alishie in this weird voice anytime she gets a chance. I get called LiLi, but I don't think people would think that's from my name. I don't want to be called Ali because that's just as common. I would go by my middle name but I don't think it really fits me either. This post may seem like all I'm doing is dissing my name, but I really just wanted to post about if my name really suits me. 


Noble:
Meaning: of an exalted moral or mental character or excellence


Am I noble? Do I have moral and excellent character? I don't want to sound arrogant because I'm not like that at all. I don't like to talk about myself or brag. I do like to tell stories about things that have happened to me, but I'd rather not really talk that much at all. Anyways I believe that I would want to do the right thing whenever possible, and I don't want to ever cause anyone pain. I usually think a lot about things before I even decide to go through with something. It's just how I am, and sometimes I talk myself out of stuff a lot. So maybe I'm noble, but you would have to ask someone else.


Trustworthy:
Meaning :deserving of trust  or confidence; dependable; reliable:


This is what I really would like to be. I do think I can be trusted and dependable. Like I wrote earlier, I don't want to cause anyone pain, and I don't want to let anyone down. I want to be a person, my friends can turn to when they need me. I hope that this comes out to them and that this is how they would describe me besides quiet and sarcastic. 


I was just wondering about this recently, wondering if anyone else wonders if the meaning of their name matches with how they really are. I'm hoping mine does. It's a great meaning, and the type of person I want to be. I didn't talk about the protected by God part because I think that a lot of people are watched over by God even though I'm not that religious. It's also not mentioned on all the other sites I've looked at. I just wanted to focus on what was mentioned on most of the sites.


So do you believe your name matches with how you are?


Alisha 

What Is Up With This?

So Blogger has decided to change everything about it. I kind of like it, but it's gotten me more obsessed with going on here just to look at my page views. I hardly ever cared before, but now I want to know. I blame you Blogger! It makes me wonder who's looking at my blog, and I don't like that it has these off the wall sites that say they're my referring sites. I keep thinking to myself, "How do people find my blog through a site that sales sunglasses?" It's weird, and I sometimes wonder why Blogger even feels the need to tell me this. I guess I like knowing which of my posts are the most popular, but honestly I don't really care that much. I just really want to know how people find my blog from random sites I have never visited and don't pertain to blogs at all. Is it too much to ask just for that?

Previously on The Alisha Show...

So the last time I had posted I talked about a little dream of mine. Nothing too big like saving the world or becoming Batwoman(which would be awesome!), no it was just about me getting to be lazy and watch movies. I'm thinking this dream can be accomplished at any time in my life, so for now it is on hold. It's on hold primarily because I am back at the oh so wonderful Clemson University taking 2 classes instead of 1 this summer session. I wish I hadn't decided to take summer classes. First summer session fooled me into thinking this wouldn't be that bad, but right now I can't stand my Chem 102 class. I don't have the same professor as I did for Chem 101, and I really wish I did. My Chem 101 professor seemed to teach it better, and I got the material a lot easier. It's not like I'm not understanding it this time, I'm one of the few people who actually passed the first test. It's just that I feel like he doesn't really try to get us to understand it. He also wants to use a book none of us have from Chem 101. A book that all the homework's based on, but it costs at least $200, and I won't ever use it again, I'll be using it for a couple of weeks, and I won't get nearly that much back for it when I try to sell it back(if they even allow me to sell it back). I was thinking about getting the ebook, but that costs $100. They really don't want me to get this book. So for now I'm just dealing with it and trying to get through the class so I can go on to Organic in the fall. Mainly I just want to get to the fall semester. I just want to get through all of it. I really wish I could transfer in the spring but I have to wait a year and transfer in the fall. I'm hoping the next year goes by well. Anyways, last time I talked about My World With Netflix, well these next few weeks I have to live in the awful world of My World Without Netflix. I'm not looking forward to it. Wish me luck with these next few weeks!

Alisha

My Ultimate Dream

This is sad but true, my ultimate dream is to have nothing to do and be able to watch random movies on Netflix all day. Ok maybe some days I actually nearly accomplish this dream. Case in point: Saturday. I spent most of it watching random movies and TV shows just because I could. If only this was my everyday life. Seriously that would be a sad yet happy life. I mainly now just want this dream because of being stuck at Clemson all summer. I hate it! I want to be at home. The thing is if I was at home I wouldn't be watching Netflix all day. I only tend to do that when I don't feel like leaving my dorm room. I use to try to be out of my dorm as much as possible because I didn't like being around my roommate or some of my hallmates. I loathed being in an all girls dorm. Now I actually like my dorm but I also don't mind leaving it, but now I have the luxury of actually feeling comfortable enough that I don't feel I have to leave after being in the room for five minutes.

So about this dream of being blissfully happy about watching Netflix movies or random anime shows. This dream will most likely be achieved one day and then I will most likely have to get a real dream like being first woman president or saving the world from some horrible future disaster. But for now I will stick to my insignificant dream that makes no one happy but me. Well it would make others happy if they knew the awesomeness of what is Netflix watch instantly. Some people may think I'm weird for always watching movies on Netflix. It's not like I can watch movies as soon as they come out on DVD. For that I say, who cares. Most recent movies that have come out I don't even want to see. None of them look that appealing or remotely good. The beauty of watching movies on Netflix is that I can watch older movies and indie films I may have never watched before because I was stuck in the bubble I like to call My World Without Netflix. I only watched blockbusters that were sure to draw 100s of millions of viewers. Now I'd rather watch a indie film that's actually really good than something that was made just to earn people a lot of money. I don't just watch anything that pops up on my suggestions list but that has been super helpful. I've gotten into the habit of reading the reviews. I only started paying attention to the stars and reviews after watching a horrible movie that I later went and looked at and read the reviews about and found that nearly everyone who wrote a review said it was awful. Lesson learned. I do have those occasional moments where I'll still watch a movie because the reviews tend to be all over the place so I must find out for myself. I have found many movies I love and had never heard of until I entered what I like to call My World With Netflix. I enjoy this world quite often, yet I am still amazed I have just spent time writing a post about it. At least it's basically free since my brother made the mistake of giving me his password. I will always be grateful to him for that. I also can't believe I did this post since I'm trying to prove I don't have an addiction, and I don't, I swear!!! I am not an addict!!!! I haven't watched movies on there lately, but since I just posted this I'll probably go on there and find something interesting. It's a great way to waste my time when I've been overwhelmed with studying and stress. But i'm still not an addict!!! 

The Torture Is Almost Over

So as of today(Thursday), I am done with Chem lab for a couple of weeks and almost finished with my chemistry lecture. To be honest the class wasn't completely horrible. I do believe that my professor is a little crazy, since he did blow something up in class on purpose. Except for that the class has been fine. I like having less people in it. My professor actually knows me and I've talked to him a few times, unlike during the regular fall or spring semester when classes have over 50 students in them or maybe a 100 or possibly 300 all together, which makes it harder for me to go and talk with my professor. The only thing really bad about my summer so far is that I've spending it at Clemson. A place I have begun to loathe. I thought by the end of spring semester I actually liked it here. Boy was I wrong! No the only thing I like about this place is the friends I made over the year. Other than that I would be happy to be away from this place. I think I have put this in another post that Clemson charges too much. Well they do that for both fall, spring, and summer. Summer is outrageous. I truly hate dealing with financial aid. They are no help, and seem to want to make you end up in debt. If I had known that I would enjoy my major so much, I would of looked more into schools that offer it. Sadly even if I had known, only 72 schools offer Food Science as a major. Most of the schools only have maybe 250 undergraduates in the major. I keep going on collegeboard and other random college search sites hoping that one day the number will change. I want the number to magically increase from 72 to 100 or more as soon as I type in the words "Food Science." I know this will not happen over night, and most likely not even while I'm in college. So for now my only opinions are to stay in the same major, transfer my junior year cause my mom actually said it would be better and I agree with her. Usually she allows me to make this decision. I think her saying I can't transfer during my sophomore year is her getting some say since I have decided that I want to transfer to a school over 1,000 miles away from my hometown. She has to be okay with some part of this. I know that it will be a big change for her. This whole year I've only been 2 and a half hours away and I have a cousin who doesn't live that far away from campus. Now I want to go to a school where I know no one, and there are none of my relatives around. Amazingly, I'm perfectly okay with this. I want to get farther away, not from her, just from my small town. Other than transferring, I could stay at Clemson, and possibly end up miserable and hating it even more. I know there are no guarantees that I will like it wherever I possibly transfer, but it's at least got to be better than where I'm at now. It's making me made just typing this right now. So I'm going to stop and hope that the week off I have to go back and go through this again is at least fun. Hopefully I get to sleep a lot. I'm seriously sleep deprived since I have an 8 AM everyday and tend to not got to sleep when I should. I should know by now that midnight or 1 aren't very reasonable times to go to sleep when I have my alarm set for 6. It's not like I listen to my alarm anyways. I always wake up an hour later. Maybe I'll eventually learn, probably not.

Adios,

Alisha